


Planting the seeds

by amako



Series: Dead leaves and Withered Flowers [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Late Night Conversations, Lots of drinking, M/M, Pre-Slash, Swearing, at lot, drunk conversation, they don't have any dignity left at this point, you will learn who has the best ass
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-08
Updated: 2017-06-08
Packaged: 2018-11-11 10:33:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11146635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amako/pseuds/amako
Summary: What happens on The Night.





	Planting the seeds

**Author's Note:**

> Withered Flowers was meant to be an one-shot so this never made it into the final thing. Now that it's a story, I thought it would be nice to actually show you what happened in the first chapter. Of course, it won't make any sense if you haven't read Withered Flowers first.

"How are you going to explain the fact that I'm in your room?"

"Who cares, it's not like anyone is going to barge in without knocking first."

"You are drunk, Hyūga."

"Am I? Just in case, pass me the bottle."

 

•  


 

"I have no idea how I managed to score Mikoto, she's so out of my league it's not even funny."

"She soooo is. You're lucky."

"Look who's talking! Have you seen your wife? Even the Uzumaki woman isn't as classy as she is."

"Tell me about it. I look like a peasant next to her."

 

•

  


"Open the window, I'm sweating like a pig."

"You Uchiha are all pigs anyway."

"... if I was about three-fourth less wasted, I would punch you in the face."

"Afraid you'll miss?"

"As close to the truth as I'm willing to admit."

"You really are wasted."

 

•

  


"I'm pissed at Sarutobi. Like, pissed. Do we look like people who set giant foxes on villages for kicks?"

"You tell me, have you seen yourself in a mirror lately? Those are some creepy eyes."

"Shit, is it activated?"

"Has been for the better part of the hour."

"Fuuuuck."

 

•  


 

"Pass me the bottle."

"Again?"

"Shut up."

"..."

"What are you doing? Stop sniffing it!"

"I honestly can't remember in which one we tried to mix the modified soldier pill."

"And you're hoping to be able to smell it?"

"Well, it's better than swallowing it."

"Oh, whatever. Give it to me. Best way to find out is to taste it."

"You are suicidal, Hyūga."

"You have no idea."

 

•  


 

"I think my son is going to snap."

"Like...?"

"He's either going to do something horrifyingly homicidal or gut himself."

"Well, aren't you a ray of sunshine."

"Fuck you."

"Can't say that you're wrong, though. The kid really isn't made for this life. Look where it got us."

"We're old men getting drunk in the other's bed and complaining about life."

"Yuuuup."

"You're right, that is depressing. Pass me the bottle."

 

•  


 

"I miss Hizashi."

"No kidding. Sorry I was too late."

"Not your fault. Sarutobi never should have agreed to the trade in the first place."

"Still, I could have stopped your brother."

"Yeah, I know."

 

•  


 

"Are you crying?"

"I'm not crying."

"You are crying."

"... I hope you won't miss your yukata sleeve."

 

•  


 

"Did you hear about the group of Konoha traitors we caught?"

"Yeah, Morino asked for one my shinobi. Said they might have hidden seals that needed to be checked."

"That's fucked up. It's one thing to know, theoretically, that people can betray their village. But to actually catch traitors?"

"I know, but you said it yourself—it's easy to be pissed off at Sarutobi right now. Look at us."

"This conversation is way too serious for the amount of alcohol we drank. Pass me the bottle."

 

•  


 

"Shut up, Inoichi's is totally a 10."

"Uhu, Shikaku's is the best."

"In your dreams. My ANBU captain had us calculate the exact curve of the entire jōnin force's asses and I assure you, Inoichi's ass is gorgeous-esque."

"Gorgeous-esque, oh gods."

"Please stop laughing."

 

•  


 

"What are you going to do with your nephew?"

"Dunno. I adopted him and basically told my Elders to go fuck themselves. It was incredibly liberating."

"I wish I could do the same, those old hags are a pain in my ass."

"Who's stopping you? Coward."

"I'm not half the mad man you are, Hyūga."

 

•  


 

"Fucking hell, duck! UCHIHA, DUCK!"

"What the fuck! What was that?"

"Stay under the desk, she's not done!"

"Explain."

"That was my cousin."

"And?"

"She's trying to learn the Eight Trigrams Sixty-Four Palms."

"How does that translate to explosions?"

"She's a civilian."

"What."

"Don't ask."

 

•  


 

"Wow, is that a kunai in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

"...I'm wearing a yukata."

"Well, this is awkward."

"I'm a horny drunk, what's it to you?"

"I'm in bed with you and not overly interested. Maybe you should put the bottle down."

"You can pry this baby out of my cold, dead hands."

"I'm telling everything to Mikoto."

"How do you think Itachi and Sasuke were born? You won't tell her anything she doesn't know already."

"Too many details, Uchiha. Way too many."

 

•  
  
  
  


"Hyūga? Can I bunk over?"

"Sure, as long as you keep it in your yukata."

"You will never let me live this down, will you."

"Never."

"We really don't deserve our wives, do we."

"We don't."

"Okay, let's just sleep."

 

•

 

_Thanks for the sake and the bed. Talk to your Elders, get them to help you. Also, there is something weird under your futon but I didn't dare touch it. Might be the thing we summoned last night. Give my best to your wife and kid. (kids? Is Neji yours now?)_

 


End file.
